There will always be things to do. Always a house that needs to be cleaned, or laundry that needs to be folded. There will always be responsibilities. These responsibilities are magnified when you have children. Not only do you have their needs and wants you need to meet during the day, you always have the preparation for their needs after they go to sleep. Tack on working, and going to school on top of all of that and you have the makings of a very responsibility orientated household - or at least one that should be.
I don't do most of the household things, I'm simply not home. I do dishes when I can, clean when I can, but by the time I get home in the evenings, most of my nights are dedicated (or should be dedicated) to school.
In all of this, or with all of this, Andrea and I need to find time for one another. We go through waves like this where we almost forget that we need to spend time together as a couple, just as her and I; not as parents, not as homeowners. Even she commented just the other day that we don't physically touch one another enough. Not necessarily in a sexual way, but just in a human contact type of way.
I don't think it's that we take each other for granted, though I am positive that happens from time to time, I think it's more we get so caught up on the things that *have* to be done or *should* be done, that we forget that it's equally important to just exist and be the two of us.
We laid in bed last night, before I went back downstairs to sleep, and just talked. She had her hand on my back for part of the conversation and it was wonderful. Even when we make time for us, sometimes we just sit and watch something on the computer - we don't actually connect. It's because connecting is also a form of work, and you have to be invested in the other person at that moment to the exclusion of everything else that may be going on. Sitting and watching a tv show is easier, it requires no effort, and sometimes you need that sort of dead space time, whether you spend it staring out a window, or losing yourself in a book. Our problem is that we equate this dead space time to time we are spending together, when in reality we are in the same room, but we aren't necessarily together.
We connected last night as we talked. There was nothing to take our attention away. The room was dark, and we just talked.
Finding time is hard. There really is always something going on, or something that should be happening. Before Ziggy comes we need to find a way to really connect with one another so we have a strong base in which to apply more chaos to.