Jove was the center of attention, of course, and there was lots of chit chat but there was also a lot of awkward silences. It's hard to know what to talk about. On the one hand we are forever tied to this person, on the other hand he is essentially a stranger and we are at very different parts of our lives.
We are in our late 20's, yes Andrea - you are in your late 20's too, and raising kids in the country. We are surrounded by screaming, and diapers, and awed by their little hands and the things they say. He is nearing his 40's, his hair is greying, he has multiple degrees and lives on his own in a small apartment in the middle of the city. He has no kids, and looks as if he doesn't know how to be around them all that much.
He is such a nice guy though, he is genuine, kind, and very interested in health and a more off beat style of living - which we are also interested in. There was a lot of talk about Roman's interest in survivalism and the things that Adam knows.
Oddly enough, there was no mention, at all, of when we would conceive again. He didn't ask, we didn't offer - and that's probably for the best as that is not decided yet.
I wonder, often, what he thinks of us and if he approves. I mean, I know he must, or he wouldn't help us again - but at the same time what does he really think? Does he have this much contact with his other donor family? Does he wish we spoke more or less? I have so many questions that I just don't think you ask. It just doesn't feel appropriate and I don't want him to be put off.
I'm glad we saw him, I'm glad he and Jove got to see each other again. Jove goes to him with such ease, and they do look alike (which is weird). I still have weird feelings as I remember that he is genetically connected to a child I'm raising and I'm not. I still feel put off by the fact the contract we signed only involved him and Andrea - like I wasn't a part of this at all. It's still a weird relationship for me, one that I haven't sorted my feeling through yet.
|Adam and Jove|